Beyond Toxic - E-book - ePub

When we think about our future love stories, it should mark the start of all things beautiful, shouldn't it? However, the reality can be starkly different. Two individuals, driven by desperation to salvage a deteriorating relationship, escalate their toxicity into a marriage. For their children, born into this toxic environment, it becomes a curse. This is not just a story; it's a devastating reality.
It tells of a child who endured profound loss due to parents bound by toxicity-parents who used their own children as pawns in a game of manipulation. It paints a picture of a childhood marred by suffering, with parents undeserving of the title.  The future for these children was a path fraught with mental, physical, and emotional exhaustion-a one-way street leading to failure and despair. Imagine being born into a world where you never chose to exist, only to be greeted with trauma, pain, and unjust blame.
These are the very parents who refuse to acknowledge their actions, shifting responsibility onto innocent children, burdening them with mistakes, hurt, and perpetual drama. I grew up with my father's alcoholism and my mother's narcissism. From the tender age of 3, blame was always directed at me for any mistakes my father made. At just 5 years old and weighing 19 kilograms, I was put on a diet that marked the beginning of my struggles with my body, my confidence and weight.
My father's numerous suicide attempts became a regular part of my life. When my mother traveled for work, I became the household detective, monitoring my father's drinking and when she would return he would disappear for days.  I was forbidden from speaking about what happened at home; there were severe consequences if I did. Emotional, loving and regular human security was a foreign concept to me.
My parents' constant fighting caused me to wet the bed until I was 12 years old. I took it upon myself to shield my baby sister from the chaos in our home, but eventually, my parents turned her against me, stripping away my last source of comfort. Lies were spread throughout my family about me because i was so involved with my parents drama that my mom and dad labelled me as a liar. A title i carry with me to this day and it hurts. This is my true story.